Another Year Older

As of today, I am official in my 'late 30's'.

I was dreading fitting into this category - but here it is, and I'm ok with it.

(alternative: "Sorry! (read w/Monty Python inflection) Growing older has been cancelled, I've now decided I'm 32 again... Yes, that's it, 32!)

So 38 - here we go!

I've decided that my 38th year will be a good one, as I feel so much in life ultimately boils down to our attitude. I've had a couple of sucky years to be quite honest, and I'm done with it!

I'm in a season of transition in my life, as I've blogged about before. And those that may read somewhat regularly will remember, I don't like transition!!

But the fact is, this is where I'm at, and rather than keep complaining about it, I'm ready to buck up and face it. I need to set some goals, pray more confidently for direction and then proceed forward without fear.

Sounds good, doesn't it? Well gosh darn it, I'm going to!!

I want to shed my fears (with God's help, or rise above them) in my 38th year.

stop allowing worry to hold me back and slow me down

I will not care so much what others think of me in my 38th year.

I try to be nice to everyone, but if someone doesn't like me, I can't dwell on it - that's their choice

I will not feel guilty about doing things for myself that are necessary for me to be healthy in mind, body and spirit in my 38th year.

it's time to accept that doing things for myself (doctor's visits, bible study, a walk, etc..) are things that will make me a better wife and mother and are therefore necessary

So I'm taking charge starting now!! I'm marching right up stairs and getting a peanut butter cup my husband bought me because it's good for my well being!! (ok, not the start I was originally thinking of, but it will do)

This is it - here I come!

Bliss!!

I had 10 minutes to myself... So what did I do? I watched me a lil' Paula Dean y'all!

I LOVE her!! She's my kinda people. But I didn't know how much I adored the queen of butter until I saw the masterpiece she made that particular day.

I can not tell you the name of this sweet heavenly confection, but I call it "Almond Joy Cake". I saw the teaser of what she'd be making for the dessert portion of the episode and ran (yes, I do it time and again, especially if it pertains to dessert) into the kitchen to get a pen and paper.

I tried looking the recipe up on line, but it does not seem to be on their. So, here's what I got from my chicken scratches.

Spray a 9 x 13 pan with Pam.
Spread 1C. shredded coconut over the bottom of the pan.
Spread 1/2 C. chopped pecans over the coconut.
Make a German chocolate cake according to box instructions.
Chop 10 mini-Almond Joy bars.
Add the candy to the cake batter and pour into the pan.

Mix 1 stick softened butter, 8oz of softened cream cheese and 2 C. confectioners sugar.
Drop mixture in big dollops on top of the cake batter.

Bake according to box instructions (may need to add a minute or two).

(now, this is why I LOVE Ms. Dean)
If this is not enough.....
Chocolate Glaze:
In a pan over medium heat:
1 stick butter, 1/4 C. cocoa, 1/2 C. milk, about 1 1/2 C. confectioners sugar (a little almond extract or vanilla)

Once cake is out of oven, and while still in the pan, pour this glaze over the top.

I made this a few weeks ago for a family party. I decided, that being the hostess, it would be horrible manners for me to serve a new recipe without checking it first. So, being the selfless person that I am, I dug in for a sample. The most amazing thing happened. After taking that first bite, the cake seemed to start evaporating... the hole spread .. and spread... But fear not, there was plenty for the guests the next day.

I thought, maybe it's just me... maybe it isn't as good as it seems. But as each person took their first bite, the looks on their faces changed. SHANGRI-LA!!

Let me warn you though - only make this cake if you have a crowd to share it with. The old "It's so rich, I can only have a little sliver" stuff will not do!! It's addictive.

Enjoy!!!!

You think THAT's early?

We are in week two of summer vacation.

I love summer vacation.

But if I have to hear one more mother complain that their cherubs are waking them up at 7:00+ am... 7:00 AM!!!!!!!! (please read '7:00 am' with Sam Kinisonesk inflection!) I'll slap them! (well... ok, no I wont... but I'll feel like it! But then very shortly after feel horribly guilty about feeling that way and eat something to cover my guilt..... Forget it! I'm not going with the slap instinct. I'll go with inner frustration... which will also cause me to eat...)

"Mummy... mummy.... can we go play Farm Town? ? ? Mummy.. when can we go play on the computer? ? ? Mummy.... can I have some chocolate milk? ? ? Mummy... can I have some candy? ? ? Mummy.... are you ever getting up? ? ? I'm never going to get to play Farm Town again!!!!!"

7:00 am.... 7:00 am!!!!!

No no my friends. The above begging begins at 5:15 am!!!!!!!!!!!! Husband is up at 5:00 am and leaves at about 6:00 am on a typical day. Therefore, I do not get up until he leaves. But son #1 can't stand for me to be in bed if he's awake, unless it's a weekend because then dad is on the computer with him.

I dream of 7:00 am!!!

The real cruelty is that the younger one doesn't get up (if left to himself) until about 6:30 am. 'Oh... 6:30 am... how sweet it would be to awake to your beautiful numbers brightly displayed on the digital alarm clock!'

I have a plan for pay back though!

When the boy is in his teens I will become the parade marshal of our home. As marshal, I will schedule regular processions through the parade route (aka - his bedroom) to begin precisely at 4:30 am! Not only will I be marshal, but also, I will be the drummer! With great enthusiasm I shall march along keeping time with my shinny pot and wooden spoon.

When he has awakened, maybe I'll request a snack. I do believe however that I will be met with a flying pillow. But it will be so worth it!!!

7:00 am...

If This Doesn't Say It All..

Pictures are worth a thousand words, yes?

Well if these two pictures don't say it all, I'd never be able to explain it to you!

Wait for it.....

Note to self: Next time you want to make frosting with the kids, open bag of confectionairy sugar, pour it on self, children and all around kitchen and save yourself some time.

(FYI: I was not so amused when this happened. I peeled off the boys shirts and was about to send them to their rooms, but couldn't resist getting a picture first. The older one bolted first - don't think he wanted evidence for dad.)

Oops.. He Did It Again

I can only imagine the phone calls that came after...

"Hey Suzie, I have a funny story for you! I was at The Christmas Tree Shop and,.. yes, I do love a bargin! Any how, I was there looking at a greater and,... well you never know when you're going to need one..... I don't know. Maybe I'll want some fresh parmasian someday. So I'm standing there and this woman and her little boy come by. I smiled at the little boy - he was cute and was bee boppin' to the music on the speaker. Any how, they passed by and like a few seconds later I hear, "Hey mummy, look. I'm picking my bum!" I couldn't help it, I laughed out loud! When the mother looked at me I clamped my hand over my mouth and tried not to look at them. Yeah, she was like 'Be nice! Stop saying fresh words.' But then the kid kept saying it and then starting doing this sing song thing like 'bummy bum bum' or something like that. It was great!"

So glad that we were able to do our part in bringing a smile to someones face today!

Every Child Is Perfectly Designed

I had the pleasure of attending 'Beyond Bossing, Begging and Bribing" a talk presented by The Better Behavior Bureau speaker/founder Jeanine Fitzgerald on Wednesday evening.

I was fortunate enough to hear Jeanine speak a few years back and was thrilled for another ride. She is blunt, honest, dry and hysterically funny!! It was a free night that not only benefited me as a parent, but also gave me a few hours for my continuing ed for my family child care license. So I grabbed my cup of iced caffeine and and off I went for my 'night out'. (hey, I take what I can get!)

I'm going to bullet point (you know how I love to bullet point) some of my most favorite things that she had to share. Some serious wisdom here from Mrs. Fitzgerald, so take some notes...

* "Every child is perfectly designed." They don't need 'fixing' - but we need how to reach them on their level. Ok, as a Christian, I'd prefer 'every child is perfectly created' - but no need to split hairs. This is a beautiful point!

* "Temperament is genetic." Take a good look at your little cherub(s) and you're bound to find bits of yourself and your spouse. Of course, those traits that are maybe... undesirable, we'll say they get those from dad. (or mom, depending on who's reading ;)

*"Some children are 'discipline resistant'." Isn't that a fabulous term? Love it!

*Effective Commands: "Discern when kids get a choice and when not." If something is not a choice, don't phrase it as such. "Deliver so a child can hear (no extra words)" example: "Pjs now" "Statement" (when it's not a choice) example: "It's time to go upstairs" (keep away from 'I need or you need' kid don't care what you need and what they need is subjective) Say things 3 - 5 ft away. Wait 10 seconds before you repeat yourself.

*"75% of parents give in" - Wow! This is why kids will hold out - they have a great chance that in the end they'll get their way. Say something twice - if they don't respond, take action! example "Go to the car now" (child - "no" or just doesn't move from the playground).. wait 10 seconds... "Go to the car now" (same response from child) .. wait 10 seconds... Now it's time to go and get the child, no bribing or begging.

* "Epidemic in the U.S. It's called 'Childhood Affluenza'" - LOVED this!! Lots of info on this category. I'll just mention a bit of it. 1. American children are the most unhappy children in the world and the most demanding. (per a source she named but I don't recall) 2. Gifts should be kept to gift giving occasions not, "oh, it's Tuesday, lets go buy jr a new $100 item". 3. There's a difference between responsibilities and jobs. Doing your normal personal care/house cleaning is a responsibility not a job. Allowances should be for doing jobs that are over and above responsibilities. example: cleaning room, taking out trash, putting away laundry,etc. - responsibility. helping parent make copies for work, washing parents car, etc. - job to earn reasonable pay - not exorbitant fee.

* She did a wonderful chart of personalities. Quick paced/slow paced/ task oriented/ people oriented. Great stuff!! Helps to understand what speaks to your child and how to best reach them on their level. If anyone wants more info on this, let me know.

This is just a smattering of what was shared at the talk. It really was great stuff and my typing it out can't do it justice. If you get the chance to hear Jeanine, I'd highly recommend going!! I'll be keeping a look out to see if she'll be around again - I'll post here if she is.

One last thing for all of us parents to remember. (ready - this is highly convicting!) On average, children speak with their parents (conversation) 7 minutes a day! Ouch!!!

We all have the same number of hours in our day.

What are our priorities?

Square Peg

Square Peg: a person in a position, situation, etc. for which they are unsuited or unqualified.

Time and time again, I am finding myself in very uncomfortable situations. This square peg just isn't fittin' into some of the circles I used to! (or jeans... I'm just sayin')

I frequently find myself looking on to a conversation or event with nothing to add. Yes, me, at a loss for words! (Those who know me well are raising their eyebrows right now.) Then, I start to have an inner dialog and analyze the fact that I have nothing to add. Let me just say right now, that I am a champion over-analyzer!!!! (this is common with us chicas, I know)

Has this happen to you?

Through my 'over-analyzing', I have come to believe that in some circumstances, I have outgrown the relationship. (by this, please understand that I don't mean I'm 'better' than anyone! rather, our thoughts, values, perspectives have just gone in different directions.) We don't look at things the same way or value things on the same level. What is of primary interest and important to me is not to them, and visa versa. One's ways are not better than the others, just different.

I'm wondering if again, I'm entering another season of life. We are constantly a work in progress. I think I may just be on the Potter's wheel again getting reshaped. (this time could it involve a smaller dress size too please.. you know, while you're at it and all..)

As uncomfortable as it is (and it really is!!!) I'm reminded of what great comfort and wisdom I get from reading the book of James. I remember that God will perfect us in our faith through trials.

Lord, this too shall pass I know. Help me not give in to self doubt or fear as I know You are in control and have a greater purpose for everything! Thank you for the joy you have given me and that even in trial, it never dies out!!

Amen!