Thursday, April 17, 2008

Hare today.. gone tomorrow... back next year

We spotted a welcomed old friend today (welcome that is until we get the garden going... then we'll see...)
This time last year, we saw to our delight a baby bunny hopping through our front yard. As the Spring turned to summer, we had many bunny sightings and discovered that he (or she) had a favorite resting spot under our slide. As fall approached, our little friend had grown up quite a bit, and we wondered by winter if we'd see him again.

Well, we have!! (and if you have some scientific explanation as to why it can't be the same bunny - keep it to yourself! we're enjoying our belief that this is indeed the same little fuzz ball!!)

Here is a photo of the closest thing we'll ever get to a pet.

Jack is trying to come up with a name for the bunny that isn't Star Wars related (I'm no fun!!)

Tuesday, April 8, 2008

A 'Tasteful' Post

Ok, I promised something upbeat!

My friend Missy just started selling Tastefully Simple this past year, and now has web site for her business.

If you've never tried T.S. before, the food is convenient and very very yummy!!!

Monday, April 7, 2008

Damn Breaks

I've been feeling it build up.. yet it's never a good time.
Things to be done (not that they all get done), kids to watch (ie. play referee), dinner to cook, guests to entertain, meetings to be attended, plans to be made, etc...

Tonight, I was working on such tasks (actually, working on my Bible study homework which I love!), when I decided I needed a little break.
I had recorded the second part to the PBS 'Sense and Sensibility' (pretty good take), and decided to watch it. I've read the book and the Emma Thompson movie is one of my favorites, so it's safe to say that I am very familiar with the story.
A very simple scene came on. A scene where Eleanor (the eldest Miss Dashwood) is sitting in the window shelling peas looking very forlorn. Her mother calls her name, and without anything being said to her, Eleanor responds, "Mother, I am happy".

My mother was the most caring person I've ever known. And also, a great worrier. She would ask ofter how I was, and would never take a simple "I'm well" or "I'm doing good" as an answer. This would only prompt her to ask again. But in asking, it would never just be "Diane"... it would be "My angle", "My baby" (yes, at 36, I was still someones baby), "My little love"... you get the point.
This scene just made it so real that I would not have my mother inquiring after me like that again.
Let's face it people, no one loves you like your mother!! (not trying to sell fathers short I assure you, it's simply different) It's a void I can't possibly explain. One can think they know, but it really isn't something you can imagine.

I know my blog must be becoming so horribly depressing to read - sorry!!

I'm just missing her so bad it hurts tonight

I promise I'll try to post something more uplifting next time..

Friday, April 4, 2008

Scent of a Woman

Went to my Dad's house today.

Sat on the sofa, and could instantly smell my Mum....

She had been sleeping on the sofa so she wouldn't accidentally turn onto her left side where her tumor was because it was so painful.

Instantly hit me.

I had had a good morning, despite waking with a mild migraine. 'What is a "mild" migraine' you may ask?.. If I can rate my pain level below a 7, and I don't vomit, I count it as mild.
God brought a friend's pregnancy to mind this morning, and I was truly able to rejoice over this upcoming blessing.
He then brought my pastor and the church secretary, both of which I love, to mind. I felt he wanted me to pray for their day.
I then began thinking about Psalm 23, and the way in which I had heard it preached on about 10 years ago. Psalm 23:
Though I walk through (you're walking through, not staying for the duration) the valley (you can't have a valley without a mountain top) of the shadow (you can't have shadow without the great Light) of death (there is no death without abundant life with Christ Jesus) I shall fear (no fear without the peace that passes all understanding) no evil (no evil without the Holy One who conquers evil).

I felt God's love and comfort and felt the best I had in days.

Then, the sofa... Although her scent reduced me to tears with my poor Dad holding me, there was still something comforting. There was a reassurance. A reassurance that I will never forget her. Her laugh. The silly expression on her face when we'd be making a joke that went right over her head. The habit she had of clicking her nails. The image of her dancing, all in the shoulders. The image of her standing at the stove stirring gravy (she made the best gravy!!!). The way she always wanted to have her arm around me or hold my hand if I was sitting next to her (what I wouldn't give for one more hug!!!). And yes.. her scent.
It seems that now, approaching 3 weeks after her death, that the Lord is bringing me to a place where along with mourning her, I can also take delight in my memories of her.

(This is the last photo I took of my Mum, 5 days before she died. This is Billy's little hand atop hers.)