The Biggest What?

Do you love that show - 'The Biggest Looser'?
I do!!!
However... it's making me feel like the Biggest Looser!! And not in a good way...

I have struggled with my weight my whole life (yes, my whole life - I was called 'porky' as a child, and my friends called 'porky's pals'. wasn't it sweet of the little toads to give my friends a cute little pet name too?!)! I want so badly to be fit.
I know how to do it. Heaven knows that I have been to just about every Weight Watchers meeting within a 50 mile radius! I have some stories let me tell ya... Like the time in Quincy when I stepped on the scale and an alarm went off and lights started flashing! I thought for a moment that I hit 'tilt' on the WW scales, but it turns out they were having a fire drill - but the timing couldn't have been more perfect!! I gave the WW gals a good laugh.

What is wrong with me that I just can't seem to make that life change?
I'm so sad! - I actually sit watching 'The Biggest Looser' with a bag of cookies on my lap! No, I'm totally serious! I dream of craving carrot sticks!

I'm not picking on myself - I am truly perplexed as to what keeps me from making the life change and sticking with it.
I thought after the holidays that I'd be ready to get on track again..... I'm still waiting.

Anyone else? Am I the only one who can't get off the starting block?