Up Up And Away!!

Launched rockets today with my hubby, two boys and my father-in-law. Had a great time!! Beautiful weather, happy kids, great memories made!

As I sat watching the scene before me - my husband hooked up the rocket, inserted safety key, held down the launch button, heard the faint sizzling sound of the rocket being ignited, watched as the faces of my family turned skyward following the path of the rocket and burst into grins when the rocket broke apart and fell to earth gently with a sway as the parachute caught the air, it occurred to me... This is very much the pattern of my life.

So much of life is preparation, isn't it? Learning skills to be able to proceed to the next event. We learn to walk to then run, to then get places with purpose... Once we're prepared, we then try to ignite our imaginations, passions, ambitions to 'go somewhere'. We take flight. Then, we frequently run out of steam, and hope to fall as gently as the rocket did.

If the scene had ended here, it would be sad indeed - but alas, there is hope!! there is more to the story!

Once everyone stopped clapping or gleefully commenting on how high the rocket had shot that time, the race was on to gather the parts to start over. My oldest son ran after the dismantled rocket and enthusiastically rushed back to his Dad to have it reassembled to be shot off again.

My husband carefully rewound.. um.. the things (hey - I didn't say I was an expert at this rocket thing, I just learned something from it), put it back in the rocket, added a new ignitor and attached it back to the base. There we go - ready for another try!! This happened many times until the sun got too hot and we were ready to go back home for some refreshments.

When we hit a wall, run out of steam, need to change directions or just simply feel like we're in a rut, the good news is - we can pick up the pieces, reassemble and try again, and again... and again. Every day is a new opportunity to gather the pieces that aren't fitting together or are broken apart and make something new.

Maybe, we need to ignite something new - or, try a new ignitor (again, may not be giving the right names to this analogy, but go with me) - The first few launches we did, my husband used an 'A' ignitor. The launches went well! He then switched to a 'B'. The rocket soared higher into the air and moved much father from the initial launch site.

I've been doing well with A. It has been fulfilling in many ways, but lacking the satisfaction of helping my family financially, and not giving me that something I need to make me feel... hmm... I don't know. Like what I'm doing really counts. (not sure I'm explaining myself well).

So it's time for 'B'!

What is B?.. not sure - but think I may be on to something.

Had a thought in my mind, and my dear friend Jen called to encourage me today (you're such a love Jen!!!) and mentioned this B that I hadn't tolled her about... A sign?..

Not sure, but surely an encouragement to keep pressing on to 'B'!!!

So if you too are in the same.. ah, rocket, then rewind - reignite - and up up and away with you!!!!

Ramblings..Keepin' It Real

I love Beth Moore.
What I really mean is, I LOVE Beth Moore!!!!
I consider her my mentor (even though I have never personally met her).
Her love for God and zeal for the Bible encourage me more than words can say.
I have read a few of her books, completed a couple of her Bible studies (you want an in depth study, Beth's studies are the way to go let me tell ya!), I've seen her speak live once (will see her again in October - woo hoo! way more energizing than the best rock concert you can think of) and I am a faithful viewer of Wednesdays With Beth on the James Robison show (should be called the 'James & Beth Robison Show' as his wife sits there next to him every show).

Wednesdays With Beth is how I first came across Beth. Short Bible studies (about 20 minutes) where she teaches God's word in compassion and tenderness with no trace of judgement and not a drop of uncertainty. She encourages the viewers to read God's word, love it, and apply it to their lives.
Tonight's message, Beth spoke about 'Cutting the Bull' - Instead of giving the appearance of having things 100% together, when you really only have about 70%, what would happen if we were just real, and let the 70% shine through? After all, haven't we all come to grips with the fact that no one is perfect (the only perfect being to walk this earth is now in heaven preparing a mansion for all who name Him as their Savior!! AMEN!)

So let me take this time to - Be real!
I'm in valley at the moment. (but praise God, there are no valleys without mountain tops, right?!!)
* Still missing my Mum. Night time is typically the hardest when the men are all asleep.
* Not feeling very good about myself. Had a great start a few weeks back with changing my eating habits. I'm now however, back to my old ways. Afraid that very soon I'll look like Violet from 'Willy Wonka' and someone will have to roll me off. (I do look good in purple however, so at least I'll have that going for me)
* PALS is coming next week!! This is a group I do in the summer to help my son and his friends not loose any of the skills they learned during the previous school year while encouraging growth in the areas with which they have trouble. The last two years, I had everything printed, bought, put together, meetings held, etc.. by this time. This year, I'll be doing a little flying by the seat of my pants. Not something I'm comfortable with at all. I stand by the ole' "If something is worth doing - do it right!"
* Bible Study is coming! I LOVE LOVE LOVE the Bible!! I also have a heart for women - their concerns, their hearts, their well being.... So to lead a Bible study in my home is a huge privilege to me!! I am extremely humbled by the fact that 9 ladies have signed up to come and share in the learning of God's word with me. As completely thrilled as I am (and I truly am!!!), I'm a little nervous that with all else going on, I wont be able to give this my all. Praying God will just use me as a vessel and then pour out His wisdom and grace to all who attend!!

* VBS is coming - ok, I have until August to prepare for this - but I'm taking on a new role. I'll be teaching the Bible lesson. Nervous about doing a good job - and about being able to attend....

* I need a job! Here's one of the big stresses of my life at the moment!! I have been home with the kids for 5 years now!!! Even though I've done a myriad of things to keep some mullah coming in, I'm nervous about going out there again. Will I have the skills that are being sought after now, will they like me, can I find something that will fit the family? I have no definitive direction as to what field I'm meant for.. Should I go for schooling?... what?
I feel like I'm someone who does ok at many things, but great at nothing. In many ways, that's good - you know, to be well rounded (and I'm well rounded that's for sure - note the 'healthy' eating comment above). But when it comes to choosing a career - not so helpful.

*Lastly... I had a little disappointment this week. You ever have something come up where you think 'oh no - the timing is terrible, this isn't a good thing for us now' - but then when the occasion, opportunity, etc.. doesn't come about, you then feel sad about it? Well - I have that on top of everything else!!!

OK - So here's the up side to keeping it real!
* Regardless of all else - I still have the joy of the Lord!!! I am not without hope!! I have more blessings in my life than I can count.
I will come out of this valley and be atop a mountain again!!

But for the moment, if I seem a little down, just give me a gentle push, and remind me to 'keep climbing.'

10 Things I Like About Me

I came across this 'tag' and thought it was terribly difficult, but that this is probably the kind of difficult I need right now. The person who wrote the original post I read had a great top 10 list!! Mine will be much simpler - but here it goes..

1. I like my smile. No, my teeth aren't perfect (that's what I get for not continuing to use my retainers). But I like that God has given me a joyful spirit and that I am able to smile often!

2. I like my sense of humor. It's quirky, weird even. But I'm thankful that I can find so much humor in life. I can't imagine dealing with all of the ups and down life can throw my way without being able to find humor in just about every situation.

3. I like that I can bake. I find great comfort in food in general, but with baking, I find just as much comfort in baking the treat as in eating it. I also love to bake for others - I feel great when someone bites into a chocolate chip cookie and smiles. Nice to know I can do something so little that can bring someone happiness, no matter how fleeting.

4. I like that I'm a realist. An eternal optimist or pessimist I'm not. I like to deal with life as it is. Give me the facts and that's what I'll work with. Sure, I'll hope for the best, but I don't look through life with rose colored glasses.

5. I like my lips. No kidding... They aren't too thin, and not too thick. They are one of the few physical features I like about myself.

6. I like that I am compassionate. I find it important to never have an air of superiority, looking down on others who aren't just like me, or who don't act like how I want them to. Everyone has a story. One persons pain is no less real than an others. I have been on the receiving end of other's compassion and know how much it means. God has given me a sensitivity which I'm thankful for.

7. I like that I'm creative. Scrapbooking, card making, cake decorating, sewing, crocheting, etc.. Wonderful outlets which I enjoy and I love to make things for others.

8. I like that I can live frugally. I don't have a need to have the biggest, best, newest 'stuff' on the Consumer Reports list. I am happy with what we have. Sure I dream of things time and again - but I can honestly say, I'm content. Material possessions don't posses me. (thank you Lord!)

9. I like that I'm conscientious. I try to put my all into all that I do. I'm not content with just getting by. Succeed or fail, I'll know I gave it my best.

10. I like that I have a love of God's word!! Many people read the Bible, but don't really enjoy it. God blessed me with not only a love of his word, but also a love for sharing it!! God has put on my heart a desire to encourage other ladies to get into his word and let it bless their lives also!!

Ok - that's it. This was really hard!!!
Give it a go and link back :)

I am who I am

Finishing up on week three.. 12 lbs. down!!
This is great - however, I am finding it difficult already!
It's a stressful time, I turn to my faithful friend, food. Trying to change that, or at least, make better choices when I feel compelled to go to food. Sometimes successful, sometimes... not so much.
But food really is the perfect friend! It's there when you need it - it doesn't tell you anything you don't want to hear - you never have to worry if it is truly your friend, it will never say unkind things about you behind your back,....
So what is stressing me these days? Would have been Mum & Dad's 50th anniversary this weekend. My sister-in-law Paula and I had been talking about doing a party and creating a scrapbook for them. Guess may be this is why I'm finding it hard to scrap lately.
Also, found out that someone to whom I'm closely connected doesn't think very well of me. I had always suspected as much, but had someone insist I was wrong - until they told me the other night that I have been proven correct. I'm trying hard to think, 'Oh well, doesn't matter' - but I'm not fooling myself. It does matter to me. I know I can't do or say anything to change things. It's just how it is. They will always be displeased with me.. I'm not beautiful and in shape, I'm not in a very good career, I don't keep an immaculate house, etc....
But hey, I try my best! I may be big, but I do my hair and make up every day and always look at least somewhat put together. I'm not out making the big bucks, but I put my all into raising my kids, creating special events for them, being a good wife to my husband, serving the Lord at church through various ministries, etc... And although my house is by no means spotless, it will not be condemned any time soon either. It's presentable. I try my best to be kind and considerate of all. And, as I've posted before, I always need to be productive - so lazy I'm not (well.. I have my days).
I can only be who I am, right? Of course, there's always room for improvement - hence the 'healthy eating' - but who I am at the core I can't change.

Pressing on, pressing on!...

Week 1

I have survived week one of my new healthy eating lifestyle. (see how positively I phrased it?)
I have lost 7 pounds. Very good start!
Mother's Day was tricky - both due to emotions and to the fact that my husband wanted to spoil me for this weekend and did so with food! Yummy - but scary.
Once off the wagon, it is very difficult for me to get back on!
But I never really stepped down. I'd have a splurge but then be good for the next meal.
So all is well... pressing on, pressing on!..

Mother's Day

Didn't know how hard this day would be - but it is indeed hard!

I reached into the cabinet today to take out a can of pineapple to put on the ham, and that was all it took to set me off. My mother taught me to cook. I pretty much cook everything just like my mother. But then again, don't we all put pineapple on our ham?... even still.

I am blessed with two very wonderful, albeit very rough, little boys. I adore them and wouldn't trade them for the world! even on days when they smear themselves and their bedrooms in Vaseline....
But as I sat outside with them while they plastered themselves with mud, I realized, I will never have a 'mother - daughter' relationship again. Not a real one! (I say this because inevitably someone will suggest that some day I may buddy up with an older or younger lady at church or something...)

I find myself writing and the backspacing... There is much more on my heart - but even here on my own blog, I fear 1. what people will think, 2. offending people, 3. making it a very disjointed and depressing read!

So, I'll just end by saying...

I love you Mum! Happy Mother's Day!

I hope all the mother's out there have a good day!

A Good Laugh!

Is there anything better than laughter?
I mean, a really good laugh - I'm not talking polite chuckling, a little snicker or a flirtatious giggle.
I mean a good fit of laughter that makes tears run down your face, double over and even slap a knee (or whoever is sitting next to you)!!
I am blessed. I come from a family who really know how to have a boisterous chortle!
Laughing with abandon I call it. Some others may call it... frightening -but hey, to each there own.
With this being a difficult weekend for my family, it was great to get together earlier this evening to celebrate one of my nieces birthdays and have several full out belly laughs. What a lift to the spirit!
This photo is all my family would need to bring on another fit of hysterical laughter!! I hope some of them see it!!